Job humor...or is it?

Job humor...or is it? (G)

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'COMPETITIVE SALARY:'
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

'JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY:'
We have no time to train you.

'CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE:'
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.

'MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED:'
You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

'SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED:'
Some time each night and some time each weekend.

'DUTIES WILL VARY:'
Anyone in the office can boss you around.

'MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL:'
We have no quality control.

'CAREER-MINDED:'
Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

'SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE: '
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

'PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST:'
You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

'REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS:'
You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

'GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS:'
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do.

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Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at michael.bissell.conquent.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make the world... nutty.