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Whitewater is over when the First Lady sings.

If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.

Keep honking while I reload.

Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an Indian!

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

If we are what we eat; I'm cheap, fast, and easy.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

So... who lit the fuse on your tampon?

Support cannibalism -- EAT ME!

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this way.

Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

5 days a week my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park.

EARTH FIRST! We'll strip-mine the other planets later.

Your child may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.

If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.

Just say no! to sex with pro-lifers.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her ... or something like that.

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Jokeindex.com: Bill's new intern

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Bill's new intern (R)
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This is the FBI summary of a conversation that took place this week between President Clinton and Kimberly, a brand new intern in the White House. Kimberly walked into the White House for her first day of her internship and was greeted by the President.

After a short tour of the White House the President asked 'How would you like to see the Presidential Clock?' Kimberly looked troubled and said 'I don't know Mr. President. I have heard some pretty bad things about you. I don't think that would be a good idea.'

'Nonsense' said the President. 'It's just a clock.' Kimberly agreed and the President lead her into the Oval Office where they were alone. He closed the door, dropped his pants, and pulled it out.

Kimberly gasped. 'Oh that's not the Presidential Clock, that's the Presidential Cock!'

To which the President responded: 'Kimberly honey, you put a face and two hands on it and its a clock!'

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