What is the difference between zombies and patched jeans?
Zombies are dead men, Jeans are mended.
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
What do you call a one inch zombie?
Where do you go when you want to buy a zombie?
To the Mon-Store
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
What kind of candy does a zombie refuse to eat?
What do you call a zombie door-to-door salesman?
Where do zombies go swimming?
The Dead Sea
Where do most zombies live?
On dead-end streets
Why did the zombie go crazy?
Because he lost his mind.
Who does a zombie take out for dinner?
Where is the safest place in your house from a zombie?
The living room.
What does the zombie say during a wrestling match?
Do you want a piece of me???
What do you call a dead bumblebee?
Whats a zombies favorite toy?
A deady bear.
Who won the zombie war?
Nobody, it was a dead tie.
What did the zombie’s friend say when he introduced him to his girlfriend?
Good grief! Where did you dig her up from?
Why did the zombie go to hospital?
He wanted to learn, a few sick jokes.
Where do zombies go for cruises?
What did the zombie get his medal for?
I take old Starbucks Drink Cups and turn them into Lamps
The warm panels are made from melting down old Starbucks drink cups, but it looks and feels like mica or some organic material. The wood in the lampshade and base is pulled from our 100 year old house in Astoria Oregon during a remodel, and it all comes together for a beautiful, classic look.
Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at
michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.